gifts

It’s easy to curate a perfect image of your life using social media. Heck, since the beginning of time people have been wearing masks and making their lives look better than they really are. I think of the 50s housewife perfectly coiffed with dinner on the table.

BUT there’s a revolution happening. Freedom from having it all together. Women supporting women. Moms admitting that they’re flying by the seat of their pants. It’s empowering and…helps us feel a little less alone in this life.

So…let me take a moment and a pause from the super cute pictures of Bella (that I go through and delete the blurry ones) and the fun updates that include emojis. These things reflect the real me. They’re the real Bella. But they aren’t always the nitty gritty realness that’s born from confidence and courage. So let me share more into our story, Because YOU reach out to me. You tell me this inspires you.

Doing what we do best…netflix & tube feed!

I’m not sure I ever set out to inspire anyone by our story. To be honest I was just looking for friends…someone else who was up at 3am in a hospital room in a new, unknown city…wincing in pain from a major surgery but wanting to focus energy on a 1 1/2lb baby laying under bilirubin lights. What I know is through this sharing I’ve connected with others in a unique way and I’m so thankful for it. So I’ll always be honest with you. I’ll always be positive and confident in the hope of Christ but I’ll always keep things real. So let me begin…

This picture was taken a week or so ago. Yes, that is projectile vomit on the floor of our bedroom. How it goes that far? I don’t know.

The last 2 days have sucked. I’ve ugly cried more than I have in weeks. I’ve said hurtful things to Dustin. I’ve been angry at myself. My head hurts and I’m exhausted. I’m also on my period which intensifies all of this and makes me feel like a sack of potatoes.

Numerous things have made me feel this way. We found out we have a larger minimum on a huge bill from my hospitalization that we need to move around finances to afford. Last night we realized we accidentally overrode the pictures from our NICU photo shoot (Update: They Have Been Restored!!!!!)

Due to frustrations and frantically trying to locate the pictures we didn’t get to sleep until 2am…so I did the 3-5 and 7-9 shift so Dustin could rest. Today I got calls from the hospital that I mailed in the wrong part of Bella’s medical device for her ph probe, I was on the phone for over 30min fixing a billing issue with our insurance, and I learned our formula is still needing paperwork done before getting mailed to us.

Late night feeds can be fun…when we’re not exhausted!

Bella’s gtube is leaking and she’s teething. After beginning her feed this morning I tried to give her meds and the liquid sprayed all over my face and her. She ended up vomiting her whole feed down my chest and hers. I laid in dried vomit for 2hrs so she could rest on my chest with a blanket between us topless after taking my vomit soaked shirt off. My hair’s greasy and my legs are all kinds of hairy (TMI?).

Bella smells like spit up even though we just gave her a bath and her pump has been malfunctioning, throwing us off schedule. My floors are sticky from dripped formula from the pump/pump bags but I don’t have the time to mop them. I’m caught up on laundry but Dustin and I argued last night and said hurtful things because we were sleep deprived and sad over losing the pictures. All in all I feel like a mess.

BUT …

Gods been speaking to me in the midst of the crazy. He tells me I’m his and he loves Bella and I and Dustin. He says loves worth fighting for and saying I’m sorry is hard but so worth it. Serving each other. Sharing Oreos and pouring coffee keeps us going. Smiling over Bella’s new way she grabs her toes or tries to giggle warms my heart and helps me know this is all worth it. Money will be tight but Gods got all the money in the world and I just need to be still. I try to be childlike in motherhood. I try to rely on the Spirit to guide me. I try to be playful. I try to take one moment at a time. I throw my hands up a lot. I don’t have many answers. All I know is where I end God begins and He’s caring for us.

How is Bella cute even when she just threw up? Also, I love this shirt. Everything is better when we’re together baby doll.

So today was hard.

Then I got a text from a friend. We’ve been using honest company diapers. They work the best for Bella. She has sensitive skin and they’re the best fit. But they’re pricey. There’s been 3+ friends who said they have them on sale at TJ Maxx. Last time I ran out after Dustin got off work to watch Bella but size 1s were all gone. Today a friend texted me a picture and told me they were there and they’re thinking of us and love us. How thoughtful! In that moment I felt as if God had created this wonderful village around us..even though 99% haven’t met Bella in person.

But then God took it to another level.

This lovely person texted me there were gifts on our porch for us. I was tethered to Bella and couldn’t stop her feed/hold so I waited until Dustin came up to retrieve the items. He explained excitedly as he brought in lots of honest co diapers all in Bella’s size. There was also a Starbucks coffee for me!!! I have been trying to save money so I do cut back on Starbucks or other items…I drink coffee at home (somehow there’s always room in the budget for ice cream though lol) so this was a real treat!!! We both took turns sipping the chocolatey caffeine goodness.

But before then Dustin read a hand written message on the cup out loud in our living room. I believe strongly in the power of our words. Our words give life. Our words are so important. To hear Dustin deliver this message over our family brought me to tears.

In the midst of a hard day, from the handwriting of a special friend, on a coffee cup, Dustin read over the clanking of the feeding pump

“may God fill this day with wonder, joy, and assurance of his presence.”

I hear you Lord. We’re all ears ?

One of my all-time favorite things to do is send others snail mail. There’s just something about a handwritten letter that makes life seem worth living. I began sending cards when I was in college and now I use every excuse to send cards, letters, and small packages. When I began thinking of beginning this blog, I wanted it to be a space where women could be encouraged and inspired to bring a little sunshine into the world.

My great grandma is in her 90s and lives in Florida. I try to visit as much as I can but haven’t seen her since last May. Unfortunately, she has really bad hearing and a phone call is difficult. About a year ago, I began writing her little cards and notes to update her on our life. Little did I know that it became such a special thing for her. When she’s at home, she can get bored and lonely. A little fun card in the mail or a small package really makes her day seem magical.

It’s also helped me think outside of myself. Sometimes we can become so self-centered. This little habit of writing a card to my grandma helps me remember to be thankful for what I have and where I’m at in life.

For this month, I was inspired by “a box of sunshine” that I saw on Pinterest. A few years ago a friend was dealing with some really scary stuff and had to have brain surgery. While she was recovering I grabbed anything yellow that I thought she’d enjoy at the store and packaged it up. It meant a lot to her and I’m sure it made her smile. As the sun began peeking out of the clouds this month, I decided to send other boxes of sunshine to my great grandma, grandma, and little sister-in-law.

Here are the items I included in my happy mail packages:

-Reese’s Eggs

-Juicy Fruit Gum

-Yellow Washi Tape

-Bright Lollipops

-Stickers

-Pens

-Printables

-Cute Notebooks

-Wooly Willy Toys (Remember these?)

Most the items were less than $1 and the bright yellow bag was only 25 cents at Walmart. I used the bags to gather the materials inside an envelope to mail out. They look like little goodie bags. You can also purchase yellow shredded paper to add some fun to the package. A little does go a long way though! (We had it everywhere in the house and had to keep the kitties from eating it) Yellow shredded paper filler is available at the dollar tree. I had at least 1/2 the bag left after putting together these happy mail packages.

When I was putting together the happy mail packages, I tried to think of each person. Would they enjoy a notebook? How would they use the printable? My grandma reads her Bible every morning and likes to use bookmarks. This fun little printable can help hold her place or she can put it up on the fridge. I also know my great grandma loves chocolate. She would be someone that would love the Reese’s Egg.

I picked out the two printable’s I found on Pinterest. I simply typed “free spring printable” and these came up! When looking for a printable, make sure they really are free and always give credit to whom you use them from.

Here are the ones featured in this project:

Happy Spring Printable from Tatertots and Jello

I Know My Redeemer Lives from Yellow Bliss Road

Dance In the Rain! from Everything Etsy

Can you think of someone in need of a little spring cheer? This type of happy mail project is simple and doesn’t need to cost a lot. I choose to print the printables at the UPS store on cardstock but you can do it right at home. Also, it’s fun to have a sense of humor about the gift too! The Wooly Willy boards are fun and quirky. I picked them up at Walmart in their Easter section.

Other ideas of items to include:

-Breath Mints

-Scrapbook Accessories

-Beauty Samples

-Lipgloss

-Face Masks

-Magazines

-Confetti

-Cupcake Accessories

-Pictures

-Bible Verses

You can include as much (or as little) as you’d like in your happy mail gift. As you can see by the pictures, you can mix and match items and find the perfect fit for the recipient. I placed the goodies in my yellow bags and then tucked them into bubble mailers. I think shipping for a few light items will be between $3-4. I also wrote cards and included a fun few photographs. Whenever Walgreens has a picture printing deal (less than 10 cents each) I buy a lot of photos of our house, us, the cats, etc. My great grandma loves to get pictures of us since she doesn’t use Facebook or other social media.

If you’d like to give more happy mail, keep a list of items you’d like to send/receive on your iPhone or in your wallet. As you shop at the Dollar Tree or Target, keep an eye out for sale and clearance items that you can add to your happy mail stash. The more items you have acquired, the cheaper and easier the process of sending mail will be. I always keep an eye out for sale bubble mailers with pretty designs and buy tissue paper in bulk! If you can’t think of anyone you know personally that needs Happy Mail, call your local nursing home or church and ask for referrals. Chances are, there are widows or others in need that you can give happy mail to!

Have a splendid spring!

Love & Laughter,

Tiffany

Bonus: These are ready to mail out!

Sometimes God Speaks From A Starbucks Cup.

But then God took it to another level.

“may God fill this day with wonder, joy, and assurance of his presence.”

Brighten Someone’s Day With a Package of Spring Happy Mail

It’s also helped me think outside of myself. Sometimes we can become so self-centered. This little habit of writing a card to my grandma helps me remember to be thankful for what I have and where I’m at in life.